The story of David and Goliath is a well known one, whether or not you were raised in church. It’s the classic underdog wins over the big guy, a small farm team beats the favored one with all the financial backing, the scrappy inner city kid wins out over the trust fund baby. It’s a storyline that resonates with us all, wanting the unexpected one to win over power and greed, over sheer might and one where the underdog beats out the ‘bad guys’ in the story.
Today as I was reading in 1 Samuel, something else stuck me about this story. You see, when David came to see his brothers to bring some snacks from home, he hadn’t anticipated getting into the fight. When it became obvious that he needed to since the entire army was afraid, Saul offered him his armor.
David put it on initially, walked around and then took it off.
Nope, he said, “I cannot go in these… because I am not used to them” (1 Same 17:39, NIV). I have heard countless sermons on this, because of course David was a shepherd. He didn’t use armor, perhaps it was too big or awkward… regardless. David was like – NOPE, NOT THIS.
Somehow, this hit me as a parent today.
You see, as people who follow Jesus, especially if your faith grew in evangelical spaces, you tried to ‘train up your children in the way they should go’ so that they would know the Lord and choose the Lord in their adult lives.
When they choose NOT to, it can be disheartening at first. So for those of you who might be in that space, I want to let you know you are not alone. I see you.. I hear you.. and I know your heart is breaking in some way.
God’s not done pursuing your children. Remember they still are image bearers. It might take some time to see how they are reflecting it, but it’s there. Continue to love them deeply, and bless them. They still need it.
As I thought about David’s words … wearing a coat of armor and a bronze helmet … “I’m not used to them“. Maybe its just an imagery thing but when Paul talks about putting on the armor o f God in Ephesians , this comes to mind.
Yes, you may have modeled for your children how to pray, you might have prayed with them. You probably went over this passage with them, using visual imagery of how to protect their heart and mind.
Yet when they are on their own – remember they are navigating a world vastly different than you did. Their tools may not be the same, and they might not be comfortable wearing the ‘armor’ you handed them.
The original Hebrew word used in this section [nasa] is helpful here. It actually means tested or tried. Of course as a shepherd he wasn’t used to wearing armor… but it didn’t mean he wasn’t strong or confident.
The same is true of your children as they launch into the world. Remember that.
As your young adult children take their place in the world, remember that their faith, walking out the image of God in the world, and ‘fighting’ their battles could look very different than it does in your life. Yes, there are ‘tools’ that are tried and tested over generations in the life of faith, but you had to learn to use them at one time too.
So do they. Give them that space. In the meantime, trust they are using the tools they have gathered as they have been growing up to walk forward in the world, and they will do the work of figuring out which ones to keep and which ones to let go of.
Happy Sabbath, my friends!
Finding the Life 